Chapter Text
(Mini)-Still Perfect
"This definitely can't be true." Lincoln thought to himself as he rummaged through the attic. "Who am I kidding? It is."
A wonderful horoscope for the future was shown when he was ready to show the others the mug he had just made.
"There you are." The desired box with “DO NOT OPEN” was quickly found; upon opening it, Lincoln saw all his previous gifts to his parents. "Even with the spoiler, it's sad."
"Hey Lincoln, what are you doing here?" Luan's voice made him flinch in surprise.
"Well, as you can see, Luan." Lincoln turned to his sister, pointing at the box. “I realize what I didn’t want.”
Luan let out a shocked gasp when she saw the writing. "Oh, that's..." She hesitated. "I won't joke, I'll leave you alone."
Left alone, Lincoln examined the mugs. “But why don’t mom and dad like them? I give them every time, and...” Slow understanding came to him. “Why do I give mugs every time?”
While examining one of the circles, he carelessly tore off its handle. “Oops, yeah, if I accidentally tore off the handle just by pulling it, then probably if you drink from it, the mug will probably completely fall apart.” Lincoln sighed. “I think I understand mom and dad now; I wouldn’t use those either.”
Having closed the box back and put it back in its place, Lincoln now took his dad's old camera, which, due to the fact that he had not activated it, accidentally had three films, not two. "We can do something else with this." He thought.
Coming down from the attic, Lincoln found all his sisters.
"It's amazing that you found this yourself." Lori spoke disinterestedly while looking at the phone. "I thought Lola would let it slip."
"Hey!" The princess was indignant. “I would definitely try not to tell!”
"Whatever." Lori waved her hand. "Neither of us wanted to say that Mom and Dad don't like your trash."
"You know, you could have said it less harshly." Luna looked at her sister disapprovingly.
"Yes, Lori, I understand, har-har." Lincoln made a 'blah blah blah' gesture.
"That's rude, Lori!" Leni put her hands on her belt. "Lincy sure tried his best when he made those things!"
"Probably not, Leni." At this phrase, he received a surprised look from everyone.
“What happened to 'My gift is the best!'?” Lynn Junior raised an eyebrow.
"Well..." Lincoln scratched the back of his head in embarrassment. "I realized that my 'best' gift wasn't that great after all." He raised the camera so everyone could see it. “But now this will definitely be the best gift.”
"Daddy's old camera?" Lana asked in surprise.
"This little thing is older than some of us!" Lola added.
"Why use that old thing when you can just use a cellphone?" Lori took a selfie.
"Because that would be like painting the Mona Lisa with a crayon." Lincoln said, rolling his eyes.
Lori chuckled. "Wow. This may be the year you don't fail miserably and crush Mom and Dad's souls." Lori went into the backyard.
"Oh, poor Lori!" Leni sighed. "She's really angry this week! Like a shark!" The blonde also went into the backyard.
"How polite of you, Lori." Lincoln muttered. "Okay, everyone to the backyard."
Looking at the photo he just took, Lincoln roughly understands why the 'alternate himself' wanted to take another one; the chaos happening in the photo does not seem attractive.
"However, chaos is one of the traits of our family." This thought made him smile. “And it will be more pleasant for mom and dad to look at the real us.” This thought led to another. “Yeah, it’s not nice when someone tries to replace the real you with something else. I need to put myself in their place. I wouldn’t want someone hiding my chip on a tooth, changing my hairstyle, or anything else.”
Looking at the photo again, he had an idea: there were two more films left, so why not take two more photos?
"Girls, wait!" He ran after the departing sisters. "Let's take two more photos! Let it be a gift from all of us!"
(Mini)-Softer Pressure
"You know you want these!" Lola rubs underwear on Lincoln's face.
"Lola, stop shoving underwear in my face." Lincoln took the laundry from his sister and threw it behind the couch.
Grumbling a little, the princess sat down next to him.
Lincoln decided to allow the competition to be the same as in the original: victorious Lily. The lesson that they would all learn to respect each other’s habits (and they would buy him winning underpants) suited him quite well. But still, there are some reservations: he himself doesn’t really suffer from reading in his pants; either he managed to get used to it because of the incident with the earbuds, or he’s too decisive.
Lana dropped out earlier. Lola personally opened the door for her to go outside, and to the condemning glances, she replied, “She loves dirt; it would be cruel to keep her inside.” And the princess herself does not watch the others so strictly, but Leni, Luna, Lynn, and Lucy still failed. Lori was eliminated because of Bobby, and Lisa was eliminated because of Lori. And in the end, it was him, Lola, Luan, and Lily.
Lola didn't stop Lori from meeting her boyfriend, and Lincoln decided not to give Luan a reason to lose.
"You don't have to sit with such a long face! It's..." Luan hesitated and put her hands on her face. "I can't joke." She moaned.
"Well, once we're done, Luan, you'll have plenty of time." Lincoln chuckled.
Luan moaned pitifully. Then she got up and went to the window.
"Aren't you uncomfortable reading in your pants?" Lola asked Lincoln with a sigh.
“Rather, yes, but...” A fleeting glance at his sister’s face painted with makeup almost made him laugh, but Lincoln restrained himself. "I think I'm too determined to win."
"It's clear." Lola sighed and then looked around and realized that no one was looking, so she leaned over to her brother. "Lincy, can I borrow your earbuds for tomorrow?"
"Yeah." Quietly, he answered. They decided to keep the existence of earbuds a secret; Lincoln didn't really want to explain himself to the others, and Lola didn't want to bother him (and sometimes use them herself).
"Why has the chicken crossed the road? Heh, probably to get to the other side." Luan giggled and immediately covered her mouth with her hands, hoping no one heard her.
"Luan!" Lola heard her. And with crossed arms, she approached her.
"Sorry!" The comedian raised her hands up. "Lori's boyfriend was just running after the chicken and asking why it ran across the road... and I couldn't help myself." She smiled shyly.
"What an unprofessional you are." Lola ran her hand over her face, thereby touching the poorly drawn makeup. Noticing marks on her hand, she looked at her reflection in the window. "My face!" She ran to her room. And soon she returned with a clean face. "Ahh, that's better."
"Well, it's time to act." Lincoln thought as he took off his pants. "I've already learned my lesson; it's time for the others to do the same."
Tension Friendship
"Hey, Lincoln! What has two thumbs and totally wants to hang out with his best friend?" Clyde points to himself. "This guy!"
"Hey, Clyde, we think the same!" Lincoln gives a thumbs up before walking out and closing the door.
"Oh, I thought we'd be at your place today." Clyde sighed.
"I think I want to be somewhere else today." Lincoln shrugged. "I thought maybe one of my sisters would want to spend time with me, but no." He sighed. "Did something happen at your house?"
“My dads decided to do a thorough cleaning of the house and, at the same time, wanted to get rid of insects and scatter something that’s better not to breathe.” Clyde scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.
"It's okay, Clyde." Lincoln patted his friend on the shoulder. "We could hang out somewhere else. Maybe at Gus's?"
"I haven't got any pocket money yet." Clyde turned out his pants pockets to show that they were empty.
"Oh, it's nothing." Lincoln patted his pockets, from which a ringing sound could be heard. "I can afford to pay for both."
"But didn't you spend the money on those earbuds?" Clyde raised an eyebrow in surprise.
"Well, yes, but no." Lincoln chuckled. “When I gave money to the drone, I didn’t notice how it broke, and in the end, I later found my money just lying on the ground next to the wreckage of the drone; I kept the money for myself and gave the drone to Lisa.”
"And then nothing happened?" Clyde was even more surprised.
"... In general, something like this." Lincoln finished explaining to Clyde the recent events from his home.
"My beautiful Lori in the pool..." Clyde muttered.
"Enough with that already." Lincoln tickled his friend on the forehead. "Were you listening or thinking about Lori?"
Lincoln first talked about the incident with the pool and how he tried to persuade his sisters to be more calm, but it all ended with them banning all pools, and in the end, the Loud siblings decided to buy their own. And then he started talking about the competition.
"Sorry, you ended up losing the competition on purpose." Clyde smiled awkwardly.
"Yeah, and in the end we decided that it wasn't worth banning anyone's habits, and I got the winning undies." The white-haired man finished his story.
“That’s cool, especially how you were able to read in your pants; you’re usually wildly uncomfortable.” Clyde nodded approvingly.
"Sheer naked determination." Lincoln replied, but then chuckled. "Hah, Luan would like this unplanned joke. Oh, we're already there!" He pointed to the arcade building.
Upon entering the building, the smell of pizza immediately entered their noses, and their ears heard the sounds of arcade machines.
"Let's get drinks and pizza first and then go to the arcade?"
Lincoln and Clyde sighed when they saw another “Game Over." They had been trying to defeat That One Boss for half an hour, and his mocking laugh and phrases like “Pathetic weaklings” only provoked the guys.
"Not bad," Lincoln heard a familiar girl's voice behind him. "For the sausage fingers."
Turning around, he was glad that at that moment he was not drinking soda, because the sight of Ronnie Anne suddenly appearing would definitely make him spit out the drink.
"Hey, that was a good try! And my fingers don't..." Also turning around, Clyde, like his friend, was surprised by her appearance.
"Hey Lame-O." She waved at Lincoln and then looked at Clyde. "Your friend?"
"Hi Ronnie." Lincoln waved back. "Not just a friend." He put his arm around Clyde's shoulders. "Ronnie Anne, meet Clyde McBride, my best friend!"
"Hello." Clyde said, not particularly interested.
"Yeah, cool." Ronnie Anne rudely pushed Clyde away from the arcade game. "Move over, nerd, now I'll show you how the masters work."
McBride frowned at her back, and then turned his gaze to Lincoln; in response, he received a pleading look. Sighing, Clyde nodded to Lincoln, who immediately perked up.
Standing on the girl's side, they began to watch with interest as Ronnie Anne began to play. She quickly moved through the levels, and the boys commented on how well she was doing; Clyde, who decided to give it a chance, sincerely, like Lincoln, admired some of the combinations she pulled off. And soon she reached the end; the boss said his catchphrase, “You will bow before me!” and the battle began. Ronnie Anne's hero received several blows, but after that, she was able to press the boss against the wall and knock him out with an endless stream of blows.
Lincoln and Clyde were delighted.
"You made it!" Lincoln started first.
“I didn’t even know this was possible!” Clyde continued. "How did you do that?"
"Mastery." Ronnie Anne cracked her fingers and walked towards the arcade racing game.
Lincoln and Clyde looked at each other and exchanged smiles. And they followed her.
Now that Lincoln and Ronnie Anne had actively pressed the buttons while playing the race, Lincoln's car was confidently in the lead while Ronnie Anne remained several positions behind. The white-haired boy would have been happy to win if it weren't for Ronnie; the longer she stayed behind, the more unhappy she became.
Suddenly, Lincoln was pushed, due to which he lost control, and his car crashed into the fence. Several AI rivals overtook him, but the first among those who overtook him was Ronnie Anne. Looking in her direction, he saw that she was still looking intently at the screen.
"It was an accident." She said it completely indifferently.
Lincoln realized that this was not so; he had too much experience because some of his sisters sometimes started to play unfairly.
Sighing, he tried to play further, but it was too late; it was the last lap, and Ronnie’s dirty maneuver left him in last place. Unflattering comments about his skills upset Lincoln, but they did not kill his hope.
Now they are in a shooter game, the screen of which is ablaze with explosions and laser beams. This time, Clyde played with Ronnie Anne.
As the minutes passed, Lincoln and Clyde began to feel even more uncomfortable than when they met her. Ronnie's behavior towards Clyde was harsh, almost hostile. She ridiculed his attempts at conversation and even made a snide comment about Clyde's choice of video game character.
"That's a pretty lame character, Clyde," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “I bet you can’t even pass the first level.”
Clyde tried to remain calm but bristled at her words. “Hey,” he said in a tense voice. “It’s not about character; it’s about skills.”
Ronnie snorted. “Skill? You call that a skill?” She pointed to the screen, where Clyde's character was about to be destroyed. “It looks more like you're about to get your ass kicked.”
Lincoln felt a tightening in his stomach. He wanted to protect Clyde, but he didn't want to make the situation worse. He knew Ronnie was trying to be funny, but her humor was laced with an edge that made him and his best friend both feel awkward.
The longer they were around her, the more Lincoln began to doubt that being friends with her was a good idea. At first, I thought that she was like Lynn, a good person hidden behind some rudeness. But probably a kind person would not play dirty, throw offensive comments, or practically resort to insults.
He had hoped that spending time with her would help him understand her better, but instead he felt even more confused. He didn't know what to do with her and wasn't sure if he wanted it anymore.
As the evening progressed, Lincoln became increasingly withdrawn from the situation. He hardly spoke, his thoughts were occupied with his own thoughts. He wanted so badly to spend the evening with Clyde at the slot machines, but now all he could think about was how to get out of there. Ronnie's presence somehow ruined the whole experience. Her pranks didn’t do any better; again, jokes with tying shoelaces, trips, and even “friendly” hits on the shoulder which were painful.
In the end, Clyde couldn’t stand her anymore and left after saying goodbye.
"Why are you so rude?" Lincoln asked with his arms crossed. "Clyde wanted to be your friend just like I did."
"I have a reputation to maintain." Ronnie Anne rolled her eyes. "If I'm friends with every nerd I see, I'll become just as much of a laughing stock as you and your other friends."
That was enough. After saying goodbye, Lincoln went home. Along the way, he regretted that he had decided to trust "Episodes" so that he could become friends with her.
"Then the episodes may turn out to be wrong." This thought was very unpleasant, and Lincoln wished it wasn't so. "But what if everything is right? Maybe I'm acting too soon?" This thought and the remnants of a ghostly hope convinced him not to discuss the situation with the Clyde Fathers for now. "Eh, it would be better if I tried to introduce Lily to my hobbies that do all this..."
"You did it again, Ronnie Anne." Santiago sighed sadly. "You did it again..."
